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Godzilla (1998)

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Godzilla (1998)

$ 4.00

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“Size Does Matter,” declares the marketing campaign for Roland Emmerich’s Godzilla Americanization, and when faced with two and a half hours of U.S. soldiers jogging around Matthew Broderick as he gapes like a fair-faced fish at a sky blackened by deafening military helicopters fruitlessly and endlessly firing upon a varyingly oversized iguana, well, it’s reassuring that anything matters at all.

“Size Does Matter” is some x-treme, sunglasses-donning marketing, sure, but word is the tagline initially took on a more “size does SO matter” tone when pitched by a flustered promotion team tasked with emphasizing the film’s strong point(s). That defensiveness seems apt for a film so sure of its impending critical evisceration that it preemptively lets Roger Ebert and Gene Siskel know where they can stick their thumbs way up, with the pair featured via broad impersonation as the bumbling, gluttonous Mayor Ebert and his nagging assistant, Gene.

While the original film, Gojira, served as an allegory for the incomprehensible suffering inflicted upon Japan by the atomic bomb, Godzilla ‘98 aspires to highlight the just-as-valid suffering of Americans, such as the agonizing awkwardness of having an unpronounceable last name, or the struggle of wanting to find a big scoop, or the demoralizing effects of being “too nice.” Mostly, though, it’s big; it’s loud; it’s stupid; so size had BETTER matter, because “loud and stupid” doesn’t make for a lucrative ad campaign, even if we would all appreciate the honesty.

Featuring: Tristan, Tracy


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